Search Term Fun Time

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Blogging has fallen by the wayside for me recently, for which I apologize: I’ve started working for Autonomous Press on some very exciting projects.  While they will be ALL THE AWESOME, they’re also eating a significant portion of my brainpower.

So!  This is the part of the show where, swiping a leaf from Captain Awkward‘s book, I respond to search terms people used to get to this blog as if they are actual questions.

academic autism

IT’S EVERYWHERE.

libertarian autism tumblr

This is not the blog you are looking for.

autistic adult know how to tie shoe lace

Again, not the blog you are looking for.

i hate autistic adults

Ouch.  What did we ever do to you?

why do autistics hate people

See above.

why do so many people hate autistics

When something happens to you the same way, over and over, every single time, for decades of your life, you start to expect that it will always happen that way.  You start to feel entitled to it.  So when it changes, you are far more likely to feel frustrated, blindsided, or betrayed.  And you are far more likely to take that out on the thing that changed, rather than looking at your own expectation and whether it was reasonable.

A lot of people have a hate-jerk reaction to autistics because we’re a change.  They’re used to humans responding to them in a particular way.  We don’t.  And when we don’t, we get blamed for it, instead of the hater asking themselves whether their expectation that all humans would continue to respond to them as expected was reasonable.  (It’s not.)

why are autistic better at physics

On average?  We’re not.  Television stereotypes have got you convinced we are.

In particular – as in, why are certain autistic people better at physics than their non-autistic physics peers?  Improved pattern recognition and an ability to become deeply involved in a subject to the exclusion of basic life activities both have a lot to do with it.

Don’t worry.  You’re still a lot better at feeding yourself on time and remembering faces.

why high function autism hate small talk

In no particular order:

  1.  It’s boring.
  2.  The “social glue” slash “feeling each other out to make sure you’re not going to eat my face and I’m not going to eat your face and we cool” function that it serves for non-autistic people?  It doesn’t serve that function for autistic people.  Whether this is because autistic people’s brains use different cues to sort face-eaters from non-face-eaters, or because small talk is a boring mouth-flapping waste of valuable time that sucks the very life essence from its participants like some kind of soundwave-generated Dark Crystal, no one knows.  You can probably get some funding for that if you want to check it out.
  3. It’s boring.

job interview questions for people with autism

Here’s the things:

  1.  You can’t actually ask people in an interview if they are autistic, at least not in the United States.  That’s an ADA violation.
  2. Most “permissible” interview questions are not going to adequately identify autistic individuals.  You’ll invariably peg some autistics as not-autistic and some not-autistics as autistic that way.
  3. Why are you asking?  The candidate who is the best fit for the job and the company is going to be the candidate who is the best fit, no matter how their brain is wired.

how to deliberately fail an interview

1.  Do no research on the employer whatsoever.

2.  Freely admit that you have done no research, you don’t really care for whatever it is they do, and you don’t have any valuable skills to offer them.

3.  Stare blankly in response to any question that doesn’t seem like it can be answered by #2.

how to use aba to stop a three year old is cussing

Don’t.

Don’t.

DON’T.

ABA isn’t going to teach the kid why to stop.  Cussing in public can be a safety issue – certain words may get you beaten up, depending on who or where you are – and it is certainly an ethos issue: people are not going to take your kid seriously if they swear excessively, at any age.

These are two excellent reasons the kid should learn to control their swearing.  ABA does not teach them.  ABA teaches only that you are the bigger animal and you can make your kid do whatever you want – so if they want to do something you don’t like, they had better do it where you can’t hear.  This is probably not what you actually want to teach your kid.

Instead, ask yourself: why is the kid cussing in the first place?  Does the kid know they’re cussing?  Do they seem capable of controlling it?  For instance, does the kid say a swear (“Boobs! Hiney! Mittens!”), then look to you to see whether or how you’ll react?  Or do they seem to be doing it for their own enjoyment – for instance, because they simply enjoy the sound of the words?

If it’s the latter, firm but gentle repeated reminders that “we don’t say that word in front of other people” may work.  If it’s the former, you need to set a boundary and enforce it.  Explain clearly, in three-year-old vocabulary, that if the kid says this word at [X] activity, you will leave immediately and the kid will not get to do the activity until they can do it without swearing.  Most importantly, tell them why they are not allowed to swear at [X] activity.

Finally, if you’re cussing in front of the kid, stop. If other people are, remove the kid from their presence until they (a) stop or (b) the kid is old enough to know that just because Uncle Hal says it doesn’t mean they should.

hidden secret fuck

Have fun with that!

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