Autistic Woman Draws Map of New York Slowly and In No Detail

An autistic woman astonished onlookers today by continuing to seem reasonably content with her life despite lacking any savant-level skill whatsoever in drawing or in correctly recalling the details of famous places, as she doodled a map of New York City badly on a napkin and without a single correct detail.

“I just couldn’t believe it,” said astonished onlooker Steve Rogers, a Brooklyn native.  “She just sat at the coffee place, drawing on a napkin for like half an hour.  When she was done, the thing she’d drawn didn’t look even a little bit like New York.  Not even WWII-era New York.

“She didn’t even include a single one of the back alleys I’ve been beaten up in,” Rogers added sadly, examining the napkin.

A “savant” skill is one that would be impressive even in a person of normal human brain.   According to researchers at the Savant University School of Savantism, savant skills are pretty rare – and they are the only thing that could ever make an autistic person’s life worth living, much less keeping around for the rest of humanity.

“Without a savant skill, this woman is basically just wasting oxygen,” said university spokesdouche S. Avant.  “That she appeared to look content with her life is probably evidence that she is an idiot savant without the savant.  If you know what I mean.

“Unless looking content is a savant skill,” the spokesdouche added.

This reporter was able to fish the napkin out of the trash after the autistic woman left:

bad map



4 thoughts on “Autistic Woman Draws Map of New York Slowly and In No Detail

  1. I want to steal the word “spokesdouche” from you.

    Went to an autism awareness panel last year at the college where I work. A parent on the panel was going on about how “people with autism” (the agreed-upon terminology for the discussion) always have some amazing superpower/savant skill and that’s why the students in attendance should be nice to and get to know fellow students with autism. Since I’m neither autistic or a student at the college, I didn’t feel like I had the right to speak up and counter the notion. Plus, that was only one example of her elitist and ableist bullshit. I walked out of the room before bursting into tears. I never want a woman like that ever claiming to speak for/about my son again.

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